The Real Phil Duroux
No one is able to say just when Phil appeared in time. All throughout the known Universe, the name is awed and revered.
His first guitar was hand made by himself, carved out of the backbone of an ancient gold dragon, using wheel spokes from a flaming chariot for frets. (More drab products such as 'wood' and 'metal' were unavailable at such time - the universe was composed mainly of superheated gasses and debris from the Big Bang.)
Invented the word 'Guitar,' the words 'tremolo bar,' 'fret,' 'neck,' 'headstock,' and 'fart'.
Came eventually to Earth to wreak havoc on the Mayan musical culture, by explaining how to build amazing stone cities and step pyramids as a means of amplification. (It was all rubbish, of course; he just enjoyed watching them work like slaves . . . his slaves!)
Is in the Flitzer Book of Universal Records as being the only creature to have sampled every foodstuff known to every civilisation in the universe.
